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Zee Cake Recepie For Portal!!!!!!

Started by m0cha_man · Feb 16, 2008 · 4 replies · 3925 views
Aperture Science's cake recipe:

1 (15.25 ounce) package chocolate cake mix
1 can prepared coconut-pecan frosting
3/4 cup vegetable oil
1 cup semi sweet chocolate chips
3/4 cup butter or margarine, softened
2/3 cups granulated sugar
3 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
2/3 cup cocoa
1 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/3 cups water
1 to 2 (1 6-ounces each) cans vanilla frosting
Don't forget garnishes such as
fish-shaped crackers
fish-shaped candles
fish-shaped solid waste
fish-shaped dirt
fish-shaped ethyl benzene
fish-shaped volatile organic compounds
sediment-shaped sediment

Now all I need Is the instructions :confused:
Here is the real cake mix:

One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
One can prepared coconut pecan frosting.
3/4 cup vegetable oil.
Four large eggs.
One cup semi-sweet chocolate chips.
3/4 cups butter or margarine.
1 2/3 cups granulated sugar.
Two cups all purpose flower. (note, it says flower, not flour)

Don't forget garnishes such as:

Fish shaped crackers.
Fish shaped candies.
Fish shaped solid waste.
Fish shaped dirt.
Fish shaped ethyl benzene.
Pull and peel licorice.
Fish shaped organic compounrs and sediment shaped sediment.
Candy coated peanut butter pieces. Shaped like fish.

One cup lemon juice.

Alpha resins.
Unsaturated polyester resin.
Fiberglass surface resins.
And volatile malted milk impoundments.

Nine large egg yolks.
Twelve medium geosynthetic membranes.
One cup granulated sugar.

An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'

Two cups rhubard, sliced.
2/3 cups granulated rhubarb.
One tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.
One teaspoon grated orange rhubarb.
Three tablespoons rhubarb, on fire.
One cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb.
Two tablespoons rhubarb juice.

Adjustable aluminum head positioner.
Slaughter electric injector.
Cordless electric needle injector.
Injector needle driver.
Injector needle gun.
Cranial caps.

And it contains proven presenatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and odor control chemicals.
That will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.

> Trust your technolust
I could have sworn "Fish shaped fish" was thrown in there somewhere..
Boredom kills, and I am bored, so I should be dead, but I'm not... Does this mean I'm Immortal?

A Step in one direction is two steps away from another. Be sure you're walking the right way.
Originally posted by l337Espeon, post: 4341:
Here is the real cake mix:

One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
One can prepared coconut pecan frosting.
3/4 cup vegetable oil.
Four large eggs.
One cup semi-sweet chocolate chips.
3/4 cups butter or margarine.
1 2/3 cups granulated sugar.
Two cups all purpose flower. (note, it says flower, not flour)

Don't forget garnishes such as:

Fish shaped crackers.
Fish shaped candies.
Fish shaped solid waste.
Fish shaped dirt.
Fish shaped ethyl benzene.
Pull and peel licorice.
Fish shaped organic compounrs and sediment shaped sediment.
Candy coated peanut butter pieces. Shaped like fish.

One cup lemon juice.

Alpha resins.
Unsaturated polyester resin.
Fiberglass surface resins.
And volatile malted milk impoundments.

Nine large egg yolks.
Twelve medium geosynthetic membranes.
One cup granulated sugar.

An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'

Two cups rhubard, sliced.
2/3 cups granulated rhubarb.
One tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.
One teaspoon grated orange rhubarb.
Three tablespoons rhubarb, on fire.
One cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb.
Two tablespoons rhubarb juice.

Adjustable aluminum head positioner.
Slaughter electric injector.
Cordless electric needle injector.
Injector needle driver.
Injector needle gun.
Cranial caps.

And it contains proven presenatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and odor control chemicals.
That will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.


nothing like a little cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb with your cake ehh?
i speak for many when i say:
THE CAKE IS A LIE!!!1!!!!eleven!!!!!!one!1!!1!
:wcc:When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! GET MAD. I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!:wcc:
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